how to dump a good bottle of wine down the toilet…

Let me share the story of my Pinterest fail.

I have wanted to make wine jelly for two years but busyness and laziness got in the way. Yesterday, in a flurry of hominess, I decided to get it done.

I used a Sav Blanc I had in the fridge. I added the sugar, brought it to a boil and added the pectin. 

Boil away….

And then, after a minute, you are supposed to skim off the foam. First clue that this was going South? No foam. But I kept plugging along.

I added fresh herbs from my garden and poured the wine mix into the jars. Also, the herbs floated right to the top which looked lame and nothing like Martha’s jelly. That bitch.

So then you wait for that magic ‘pop’ that says you won’t kill people with botulism or zika virus or whatever and I was so excited because I got all four pops!

But this morning? This ain’t jelly. It’s…

white wine sweet soup?

sugared wine syrup with wilted herbs?

a pinterest fail.

Bye, bye white wine. I should have just drank the shit.

That’s what my lovely friend would have opened up and seen. My wilted, soupy love for her…. expressed with kindness and this precious hand made gift. 

The good news is, I am relentless in my pursuit of success. So screw you, canning fairy. I am going to nail this one way or the other. 

It’s 8:20am on Sunday. Where do Iget a cheap bottle of wine at this hour? I’m thinking the Catholic Church but that seems like a risky plan. I’ll keep you posted.

edit: Ijust realized it’s Saturday morning! haha. Three cheers for SUmmer holidays! Maybe I’ll go to the farmer’s market and drown my sorrows in little wine samples.


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